to be honest, mr. mike, i dont' believe that is what your wife is doing. it's your insecurities that manifest these thoughts, jme. i don't recall, do u have a T?
here's what i learned in therapy:
feelings are not facts. it sounds like you have some "old tapes" running in the background that are interfering with you enjoying your wife or trusting her. i believe if you discuss this in therapy you can replace those old tapes with true ones... i responded to "ihateit" with a similar response. therapy can aide you in seeing which beliefs on a feeling level you have that aren't true. once you can see the "old tape", sitting all by itself. you can realize it's false. then with new coping skills you can replace these false beliefs with real ones about youself and the relationships you have. i hope this helps you. keep us posted on how you are, k? we do care about u and you do matter to us.