I told T about the rejection sensitivity and transference connection.

T says that I shut down when she expects me to actually do something about a problem,

it boils down to that I am afraid to see myself for who I really am, or to let anyone else see the real me, or to actually be real. So I keep hiding and avoiding. And that the solution is to stop hiding and avoiding, and face the fear.

I forgot the not deserving help because I'm not allowed to have problems angle.

I guess I did ok this time. Only one major shutdown.