Thanks CQ, it does help to hear those words and the suggestions for the book, which I will check into first chance I get.

It just happened today, and to me, it seems to have come out of the blue. She says she's tried in the past to tell me, to put things on hold, and that's true, and I didn't really let her. I was too afraid of what that might mean, especially if she chose to go another path.

Which is exactly what I'm faced with anyway, just a few months later, and just less hopeful than ever before for the future.

I mean, truly, how many chances does one person get in this lifetime to "get it right"? I feel like I've been given 2, maybe 3, chances in this area, and each time I feel like I'm the main one who's blown it. Even now, she tries and tell me, "It's not you, it's me..." and I'm like, yeah, right. I guess blame is natural to try and do, but it's probably not all that helpful, since I'm sure it was both of us.

It's a complicated story, not sure how indepth I want to go in here, save to say, I honestly believed in my heart that she was the one, and I thought she felt the same for me. I think now that the latter part of that belief was false and she never quite felt the same way for me as I did for her.

Hanging in there,
John