this may sound a bit weird - but if anyone has any ideas I would
be grateful - my sister was in a verbally abusive relationship - she left him about 6 months ago after about 25 years - they used to drink a lot - he slowed down but she still drank - "to cope with him"

I understand that - she still has a few drinks in the evening now she has left him - when she drinks she repeats herself a lot and it gets so anything i say can be taken the wrong way -

when they used to drink when I was there - they would always get into a screaming match - and I would try to keep the kids out of it - but they have ears! - this used to trigger me to my childhood - I cant stand shouting - and now when she rings and has been drinking I am always waiting for her to take somthing I have said the wrong way - when she's not drinking we get on really well - I've tried mentioning it to her but as her husband used to say she drank too much she thinks im on his side - which im not - it gets so I dread the phone ringing.... any ideas?