Quote:
Originally Posted by trevorzero
I hope you understand that being celibate doesn't mean you cannot enjoy any physical intimacy at all. Be honest with anyone you might become close to and tell them what your boundaries are. The more time that you spend with the person, the chances are that your boundaries will begin to expand.
The point is that you have the right to insist upon a comfort zone for any activity. It isn't ever a case of "all or nothing," except with some jerk who isn't worth your time anyway.
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There is nothing wrong with being celibate in my opinion. There are sexual diseases out there, In fact in the state I live in there is an epidemic of chlamedia sp?? Also women risk pregnancy and there is aids too. I have been married and divorced 2 times and now I have been celibate many years and it is my choice not to have sex because of bad past experiences in my childhood & two failed marriages. If I ever desire the reality of sex again and find the right person to invest my trust in then I suppose I will work through my previous past sexual issues and try sex again, but in the last 8 years I really haven't found anyone worth investing in sexually. I have been satisified with flirting and no sex but find people often take flirting wrong and have an expectation for more once the flirting has begun. the reality for me is that is there expectation not mine. I can't control other people or there reactions only mine. I have lost the potential of meaningful friendships because of my no sex rule, and I have lost people I liked sincerily because they felt misled by flirting and no sex. But I think the way Trevor worded it sums up how I feel, those people aren't worth my time or tears because they lacked sensitivity to my boundaries and comfort zone and they didn't place any value on knowing me as a person without an expectation of sex. So in that case its no loss to me. I want to be liked without having to have sex with someone.