Hi Cap,

I haven't been down in these parts in awhile so I was really glad I checked it tonight to find this thread. I don't have much to add except to agree that the 12 seconds was a reminder. As I was reading your first post, I thought about any time I have a drinking dream. It always makes me look at my program and really take a look at what I might be scrimping on. This is reminding me that I had a pot smoking dream the other night and have not talked to my sponsor about it. I always talk to her when these dreams take place. Its funy, the drinking dreams are always insane, like drinking beer out of milk jugs and trying to keep it away from newcomers. But the pot dreams are SO real. And pot was never my thing. But man, I can smell it, taste it, feel it in my lungs in these dreams. So I need to remember to talk to my sponsor about the recent one.

Also, I was chatting with someone online who was smoking it and for a second, I was jeasous. That reminds me of your sudden anxiousness to enjoy those 12 seconds of floating. Sometimes, when I don't eat and then drink lots of caffeine, I get all light headed and almost like it.

I don't think any of this ever totally goes away, and I for one, am grateful for those mental slips, because if I take action on it, it keeps me from a relapse.

Thank you for sharing Cap. Hope you're feeling better.

Hugs,
Rayna