My pdoc has me on Geodon right now and I think I'm getting worse. I have tried to tell him but it's like he's not listening. I told him when I take it I often feel like I've taken LSD, that it is warping my perceptions worse not making them better, and that my anxiety level is out the roof these days. I feel like I'm living in hell. I had to go off Depakote because it was making my hair fall out. He said Geodon can also work as a mood stabilizer but it isn't working that way -- or ANY WAY -- for me right now. I've been very depressed and suicidal and so anxious and stressed I can't eat, have trouble sleeping, and have started noticing I'm "checking" things all the time -- that wasn't one of my issues before. He says Geodon doesn't cause that so I don't know what is going on but I feel like I'm really falling apart. The terror is so overwhelming all the time it's like being in a cyclone of hell and terror with demons ripping me to shreds constantly and I'm always restless. The religious terrors are the worst. I have no peace and no relief, can never relax or focus on anything.

Well I just thought I'd vent a bit. I know I'm persona non grata around here thanks to some social engineering evil types but I still need somewhere to vent.