hi BA and welcome!! here's rule of thumb that i've passed on before: if you use a substance to create a feeling or use it to numb/or get rid of a feeling you may have a problem with drugs and/or alcohol. if you're using drugs to have 'courage" it sounds like you're at the right place. if using drugs helps you to feel you "fit in" you're probably in the right place....at this forum. hope this helps and i hope to see you here again. we only have to do this for 24 hours at a time...sometimes we have to do it for for 5 minutes at a time....but those minutes add up.
if your family is worried about you then there's probably a good reason. they love you and want you to have the very best life you can have. from my own experiences i can tell you that having a substance abuse issue denies you your very life. today i have a good life and that was done by putting down the drink some years ago. hope you stick around and dont' hesitate to ask questions. we are all here to support each other.