I saw a kids TV prog way back when I was trying to figure out what was going on. I think it was called Chalky and it was about a boy who was visited by an alien entity. This entity bombarded the kid with so many questions that he couldn’t sleep. When he finally told his dad, his dad suggested asking the entity to give him a break and let him rest. The boy did this and it worked.

Now as silly as it sounds I decided to try this with my voices (it was mainly voices back then and I thought it was everything from God to ghosts and spirits). I was on my own one day and things were quite bad, I was tired and not sleeping too well and becoming quite overwhelmed by it all when I decided to ask them to go away. This would be the first time I ever talked to them.

What happened next was very frightening. Nothing. Nothing happened. Silence. Nothing and silence. I had never experienced it before. I sat there rocking back and forth with tears pouring down my face. I felt alone. I felt completely alone for the first time in my life……. And I hated it!

I went into a panic because I thought it had all gone away and it was my fault. I thought this was it, it’s gone and I’m on my own. I struggled for two or three days with the most horrendous feeling of emptiness I have ever experienced. I was sure I was definitely cracking up this time.

Then it dawned on me, if I can ask them to go away, maybe I can ask them to come back. So I did. Nothing much seemed to happen but I did feel better. After a few days, and feeling much better, I began to get very curious about the whole thing and wondered if they were back or not. Then I got something like this..

made a promise… will never leave you.

Keep in mind that I still thought I was dealing with spirits and that I might be psychic. I’m not by the way. I think I can safely say that that was my awakening. Things improved a lot. I never talked to anyone about it but I was going to learn how to accept it and stay sane.