Are you sure your desire to have sex isn't due to the molestation? I'm not saying you can't genuinely want sex, but it might be better until you've had some therapy sessions to deal with how you're feeling and the panic attacks first.

One important thing about the lube...make sure it ISN'T oil-based! Oil-based lubricants can weaken condoms, so use water-based ones instead. A very popular one is Astroglide, but certainly there are many to choose from.