ff271.
I'm truly sorry that you are going through so much...

Jme, but it seems like there are several issues that are combining to make life miserable for you.
Your traumatic experiences need to be directly addressed, again jmo, before you can make progress with your relationships.
As someone who has had similar experiences in military and civilian life, I know the havoc they wreak on our minds...

You may need to regroup and do some soul searching and make different plans. If the current situation--this counselor--is not working for you, perhaps another would be more helpful.
It's frustrating, I know, to start over but it's worth it in order to have a measure of peace and serenity.

My very best wishes to you,

Cap