KathyAnita,

It takes time to get through this. No protocols, no required feelings. You just have to do what it takes for you to get through it. Memories are with us forever even though you can't be at a ceremony. That is not the important part. Good byes are said long before any ceremonies.

I probably am not a good one provide suggestions at this time because I am not too far beyond where you are. I look back 4 months ago TODAY when my Mother died & all I see is dark. All the situations surrounding it drove me into the medical hospital with both medical & mental issues since I had no time to take care of myself, & got trapped into a situation that never should have happened.

However if there is one thing I took from all that happened is that you have to do what is necessary to take care of yourself above all, your feelings, your physical well being & all that is you .

Take care of yourself,
Debbie