Coconut,
T gets frustrated and sad for you because he is feeling along with you. I think you should tell T how frightened and alienated his statements makes you feel. It could be because this is a new experience for you...someone feeling along with you. I know it has been new for me and I can't tell you how many times--when T expressed feelings with me--I interpreted it as a negative experience. It felt so intense and I immediately pushed back because it seemed intrusive and I felt that somehow I was doing something wrong.Now I am learning that this is how we can begin to feel validated and integrated. I didn't know that because I didn't have this experience as a child. I just keep telling T to slow down when I need to.

((((((((((((((Coconut))))))))))))

Hope this helps somehow.