((((((((((((manda)))))))))))))) sending you hugs!! Remember that this could very well be another way of coping with living with them. As was echoed earlier, you may have feelings that are just too big to cope with. If your husband is gone much the Reserves and work, you are left alone, somewhere that you hate, you don't fit in and this is really, really starting to affect you. What's the status on getting a therapist--I know last time I talked to you, you didn't have one.