You are testing boundaries that are out of your mental scope at the moment........impulsivity, without calculated risk(like wearing a harness or a bungee!!) is inherently very dangerous.......

The fact that you felt no fear is an indication that your natural instincts to survive are tested beyond what you are able to endure.......

Tell your T!!. You need you, your boyfriend needs you and your dad needs you. Hospital is no fun.......but that may not be the immediate solution.......you will not know until you discuss it and accept whatever outcome.

You cannot make this decision alone.........you need help to ensure your safety.

That is your first and only priority.......Please be safe........we don't want to lose one of us