Ok.. I'm posting here because i don't want to post yet again.

I'm tired. I'm addicted to coffee. I can't get to sleep at night.
I'm going home tomorrow, and now I'm starting to be afraid of that. I'm afraid that the parents and sister will see the messed up me. I don't want to be seen like this.
I'll have to put up the old facade - that has been unpracticed because I haven't gone out, haven't had the energy for it...

I don't know what to do to get better right now, I seem to be in a rut