First of all, hugs:

Welcome to PC. I'm so glad you found this place, there are a whole bunch of wonderful people here.
What you're going through sounds absolutely terrifying, and I'm so sorry. I have no advice except KEEP GOING. One foot in front of the other. One breath at a time. Don't give up, and keep posting here. If anything, I've found it to be a great source of comfort and release when I post.
Take care.