I think the fear of dependency is pretty usual for people in therapy. After all, if we depend on someone we can get hurt right? They could pull back, not meet our needs, deny a reqest, make us feel stupid, etc., etc., etc. If we don't depend on anyone/or anything then we don't have to risk having those painful (and familiar) feelings of loss and disappointment. But those feelings are the price we pay for the other feelings we experience in intimate relationships--love, giving, understanding, hope and companionship. The yin and the yang-ya know?