(((((TMAC)))))
sorry you are feeling this way - and I apologise for those in the medical profession that are not empathic to their patients pain - I'm sorry that you cant get a good nights sleep - things are so much harder to deal with when you're not sleeping - I'm glad you came here to let it out!
are you still seeing the T you started with recently? she could help you deal with these feelings -
I hope you managed to get some sleep - come back and tell us how you're doing
take care P7
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts 
its how many times you get back up! 
(Thanks to fenrir for my Picture 
)
When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown,
Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly.
by Patrick Overton, author and poet