I think, for me, one of the pieces which helped me was to realize and accept that the wrongs done to me were done in the past and therefore, there was absolutely nothing I could do to change them. I could hate what happened, I could try to ensure that it wouldn't happen again, but those events were entirely in the past and living is about being in the present and working for the future. That really clicked for me . . . all that had happened made me who I am today.

The other piece of this, for me, was that all the anger and trying to change the past used up so much of the energy I could use now to move on and make my life better. I am not entirely comfortable with what "forgiveness" really means but for me, I realized that those people who had wronged me didn't deserve any of my energy, and that in spending my time being angry, I was continuing to still give them power over my life, something I don't think they deserve. That for me was really freeing -- like I had a choice now, even if I didn't before, and I chose to focus my energy on the present and the future and on myself.

Hope this makes sense.