Hi Sweetie, welcome!! You are asking a very complex question.......most people on here(sorry to speak for everyone!!) will probably argue that safety is your first priority. Self help takes time, money and LOTS of education.......the danger here is that you do not have a impartial, third party(therapist). To be subjective is dangerous when dx oneself........you need objectivity.

Bipolar is a demanding mistress.......and prone to momentous shifts and changes.

It is my personal opinion that initially, you cannot do this on your own. You need the impartiality of a professional to dx you and treat you.......then when you have a good handle on the situation, you can work out a plan with your therapist(POSSIBLY) to go out on your own. I have known people who have after having bipolar for many years.

At the moment you are in a cage with an unpredictable tiger........you do not have the training to tame it......you may have an understanding of the tiger but you cannot control its nature......

Thats just my opinion........whatever you decide, we are here for you. Good luck