I've heard tales from people who've had sponsees die and it's so sad. I can't imagine what that's like. I met with my sponser this morning finally for the first time and we went over our first steps. It was crazy to hear about hers. She doesn't seem like the kind of person who would have done all the stuff she did....makes me realize just how incredibly lucky I am that I caught it early. The "yets" definetly keep me going. To hear the drunken tales of other's scares the crap outta me. I wonder why I was chosen to notice my problem early, why I didn't suffer the consequences of so many. I've never had a relationship with god, and it's questions like that that have kept me from having that relationship. I guess I should just be thankful that I was chosen, and remember that every day. I actually went to my old liquor store and told the owner I quit drinking. He was very happy for me. I don't know what compelled me to tell him. He's one of those jolly older guys that I looked forward to seeing when I made my beer run. It's so wierd the things I'm compelled to do now. And I feel like when I smile, that I'm really smiling, instead of just a smile to be polite. Everyday there are new miracles. Everyday is so amazing. I hope I don't fall off the pink cloud. I don't know if I'm really on a pink cloud. It's all so new and confusing, but the funny thing is, I'm ok with that, and so relaxed. I take it a day at time and what happens happens. It's such a great feeling. And being able to talk to people like you has been such a blessing. And to see Ryan on the same road now....ah it's wonderful! Anyway, I'm just rambling now. =) Thanks.

Another day in paradise,
Rayna