Hi
I never actually cut ties with my mother, though for the last 5 or 6 years of her life I only visited her when the children asked to see her. She was in no way as abusive as the parents of the other people who have posted replies, and I can't imagine what it would be like to go through what you all have done.
She died.
There is no possiblity of changing what I did and didn't do. I could have found ways of talking about what I perceived as the problem. I didn't- I cut myself off. I could have told her I loved her. I didn't. I could have made more effort to understand her. I didn't.
Now it is too late. I have finished clearing away the issues that got in the way of my expressing my love for her - and we have no choice but to love our parents - and she is no longer there.
If you are going to cut yourself off from your mother for a time, think of it as a limited time, during which you will work through the issues you have identified and return to her when you feel stronger. Make sure you find a good support person or group to help you through.
Good luck and remember that, whatever messages you received to the contrary, you are an important and lovable person.