I am 41 and the youngest of 6 children, the only child of my father (my mother had 5 children when she married my father.) All my life my mother was controlling and verbally abusive to my father and I. When I was in my 20's early 30's I lived away from my mother and father...and was successful and happy. My father died 9 years ago and my family and I moved so that my mother could live with us. She was not doing well alone...she has never driven and even though she was always controlling and abusive to other people (my father) she was extreemly dependant also. I sure did not know what I was in for when I decided I would be the one to care for my mother. All of the memories of abuse came flooding back over the past few years. I was also SA by an older brother, and my mother "took up for him". I am now dealing with memories of my childhood that I have put far away, once they have come out..I can't get them put back again.

I feel for you and your struggles with your mother. I (my husband and family) are planning on moving..to another state...I will let my siblings finish with caring for my mother. Although no one has stepped up to the plate to do so...I hope for my mother's sake that one of them will be able to put up with her. She was miserable way back then and more so now.

Nixtribe