Hi everyone,
I have been experiencing severe dissociation lately. It all started about 4 weeks ago when the flashbacks started up again. I have been talking to my psychologist about how sometimes i lose hours and sometimes i call people more than once in a day. This startled me and has me thinking that something is going on other than just dissociating due to flashbacks. I have been dissociating during my counseling sessions and then later she tells me about what has happened or what signs there were. On wednesday I had a session with her and things well, how do i put this went really weird. I get this feeling before I dissociate. I start to feel this numbness start to overcome my whole body and then I am gone. I sometimes can remember just starting and things going in and out of my head. Anyways, I started to go numb and she said I turned into a 6 year-old little girl. I don't have the slightest clue as to why I woulld do that, or what would bring that on.
We started talking, me and my counselor, and i asked her if i was crazy because i felt and still do feel like i am going crazy. I don't think people would understand if I told them what was happening and going on with me when I am at home or even at work for that matter. I am scared. I asked her, kinda jokingly, if I had multiple personality disorder, and she told me it's now called DID and she didn't know. She couldn't tell me a definite no though and that scares me even more. I have enough going on with not being able to work due to high anxiety and not being able to stay grounded, and now have to worry if I have alters that come out during the day when I can't remember things.
I am very scared and worried that people are going to think I am totally crazy and write me off as another psycho out there. I assure you I don't mean anything when I say these things, this is just what is going on in my head right now, and don't know what is wrong with me.
Just wondering if anyone has some insite, or has dealt with simular situations.
Thanks for listening.