Thank you very much Elysium. I am scared and hurt at the same time. I don't think I should have even said anything in the begining...but it's too late now. I feel so confused and will see my T. on Wednesday again. I have decided to take a leave of absence from work as well. I can't handle things there or at home for that matter, but maybe I can get away or I don't know, i just know I don't want to end up in the hospital again. Thanks again