I really want to cut. I am trying so hard to sit here and type these words and not think about the notebook beside my bed (their hiding place). My husband would be so dissapointed in me but I feel I cant talk to him about it. The last time I did it (only once other time, and it was only 4 cuts) he was so mad at me and I dont want him to be mad at me again. It just makes me feel worse. I feel so trapped. I feel so lost. I am scared and feel so alone it makes me want to cry. If only....