LOL, Elysium, I bought the DID Sourcebook (I think that's what it's called) and often used to read it to prove that I DO NOT have DID, and every time I read it, it's like....there I am!!! All over those pages!

(((((((((((beutifulxdreamr))))))))))))) Welcome

My diagnosis was Complex PTSD...it took a LONG time in therapy before T and I realized we were dealing with a bit "more" than that...

My experiences before I was diagnosed were similar to some of yours...losing time was the thing that distressed me the most. And just a sort of permanent mental confusion...like really having NO IDEA what day, month, or even SEASON it was a lot of the time. I just couldn't (and can't) hold on to time very well. My alters don't have names....my littlest one goes by the name we were called at her age (she is 3), when I was older, people started calling me by a nickname, and everyone else shares that name.

I am still in the process of discovering how my system works. I have a wonderful T who my littles ADORE....and my teen puts up with LOL...and T is helping me wade through everyone's memories and needs. It's a lot of work, and feels a little impossible sometimes. But T is patient, and experienced, and ACCEPTING, and I have hope that someday life will feel a little less confusing...

Have you considered seeing a T?? Starting therapy was really the best gift I've ever given to myself. It's gut-wrenchingly hard a lot of the time, and one of the most terrifying things I've ever done in a lot of ways....but at the same time, I am finally healing, and, especially for my littles, finally getting some big, huge needs met. I feel like my broken heart is getting pieced back together....

I hope you find some of the answers you are looking for here, although obviously, no one here could diagnose you. I know sometimes it's helpful just to hear what others' experiences are like.