Kureha,

Calmer is actually better for being alert.
When you are anxious or have anxiety, you are less alert, you can't think as straight. It's because your body is lacking in Gamma-Aminobutyric acid.

These are the results when your body lacks "Gamma". It actually results in you being less alert.

Moderate Anxiety
Selective attention (You can take some information in, but will leave other important information out because it becomes too much for your brain)
At this point you may need to have things pointed out to you.
(You may need people to help with you with problem solving because your ability to is starting to
decrease, and you can’t focus as well)

Severe Anxiety
Perceptions distorted
You can only focus on small/scattered details at this point
New stimuli can be overwhelming
Elevation in your vital signs
You can’t focus, because you become self absorbed in this stage

Panic Level Anxiety
Your unable to focus on the environment
You may feel terror, or emotional paralysis
You will experience disorganized, irrational thinking
You may have unintelligible speech
You will have feelings of dread and doom, like life is going to end
****Every person can experience this at some point in their life

I hope this helps you a little. I work in the hospital (nursing) and I see this all the time when people are anxious.
I will tell you this, the only thing I want to do is help them. I want to make things easier for them, I am in no way out to get them. It profits me nothing to hurt them, decieve them, ect.....there is nothing in that for me.

I am positive your psychologist and nurse feel the same way. The reason people get into those professions is because they want to help, they have a desire to help, and not to harm.
They only want to see you less anxious, so that things are not too overwhelming for you.
I assure you they are not out to get you. I don't even know you sweety, but I too would only want the best for you.