Hi... of course I know very little about you, but I would say 1. go with your gut feelings. I think ECT is very scary also, and you would have some memory loss.
2. you said "I don't want to continue to have negative feelings towards him." This would lead me to say "forgive him" (NOT CONDONE his behavors or forget... forgiving is about giving YOURSELF a break from the reactivity from the event). It also does NOT mean be a doormat. But let yourself go of this anger.
Course that and depression are different. How long have you had dperession? The 2 years, or longer? Has this been life-long? ECT is usually a last ditch effort. Try to get out as much as you can, find things that interest you (easier said than done, oh do i know), see people... find something that makes life important again for you.
And be gentle with you (((((((((((hugs!)))))))))))