My brother who sexually abused me as a young girl called me last night to wish me a Happy Birthday (TODAY is my birthday.) I didn't answer that phone and he left a short message. He didn't even know what day my BD is, he thought he was late in phoning.

He very rarely has remembered my birthday through the years. I most often do not hear from him.

As I've posted previously, his daughter is getting married this summer and it has stirred up a lot of uncomfortable feelings in me. I do not plan on attending the wedding.

I have most often been slowly separating myself from my family of origin over many years now. After listening to his message last night I just felt like, Enough! His family is obvious in their dislike for me - for what reasons I don't know, as far as my niece & nephews go, because they don't know about the sexual abuse.

I'm very much feeling like I need to write my brother and just say let's stop the pretense and any contact.

Should I do this? If so what should I say? Go into detail or keep it short and sweet?