Quote:
Originally Posted by hangingon
I was thinking lately about how we feel about our T's. You know how when you first meet someone, they may seem so cool but the more time you spend with them and the more you know about them, you think emm, they were not who I thought they were.
Anyways, I was thinking of the regarding T's. Like we see them one hour a week maybe two. They listen to our thoughts, needs, let us vent, create a safe enviornment for us ect. But I wonder what we would really think of them if we were to see their weaknesses. To have them snap at us about something. To see them disagree with their significant other, punish their children ect. I just wonder then how we would feel.
I think I am happy to only have that 1 hour with my T, because I would not want that bubble of how cool she is now bursted lol.....
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Are you waiting for the other shoe to drop, so to speak? I think perhaps you are thinking that it is just a matter of time for your T to let you down somehow.
I'm happy to say that my T is a really consistent guy, and having known him for about two years now, he doesn't just "create" safety in session---he is like that all the time. He isn't perfect, but I think accepting that our T's are only human is a part of the challenge a lot of people have. Sometimes, they might drop the ball on accident, but trust is built on knowing that is the EXCEPTION and not the rule.
I guess I would say I'd be careful about putting our T's on a pedestal. No one is perfect, and devaluing our T's the minute they show they are real and not perfect flawless human specimens is really hyperjudgmental on our part. Unfortunately a lot of us do that because we have been hurt too many times before and thus find it difficult to trust.
I always say take it slow and go low... trust is earned; it isn't a given. Realizing that our T's are professionals and really do care, even if they don't live up to the person we MIGHT sometimes idealize them to be-- is just a part of trusting people in general.
That's my take on it.
