Since kmk2009 asked for women to respond, too, I'm going to go ahead and post. If the thread is moved, it's moved.

Obviously, I can't diagnose your wife, but mood swings can be a sign of menopause. If I were to guess, I'd say it's menopause, not peri-menopause, but I haven't done as much research as you obviously have. I believe I may be in peri-menopause, but possibly menopause itself, although I'm not having the outbursts you're mentioning; but every woman is different.

A gynecologist can do a test to determine if your wife is indeed in peri-menopause or menopause, but getting her to go is the problem, obviously. Maybe try calling her gyno and asking for advice on getting her there, and perhaps describe the symptoms to see if s/he agrees it might be menopause.

She might also get angry because it's a hard thing for some women to face, and if she has the mood swings, that can escalate her emotions. I really wish you luck. Wish I could be of more help.