Hi Lostnbigcity,
I know it all too well that feeling of being trapped and not knowing what to do. From what you describe it sounds like, it's all about him and you and your son are left coasting along. It's sounds like you lost yourself and you're like a tree pulled out of the ground with it's roots exposed. If you know for sure this relationship isn't going any where, then you an your son should go back to your family. Life is too short to spend it in limbo just living half a life. I know what it's like. All the best to you and your son.