thank you for your reply
i know if i stay home .. it will be peaceful .. even though they will all be talking ugly about me - at least we do not have to hear it...
they hate me anyway and they try their best to keep me away from them during their holiday.
we have been pushed out all our lives and that is a huge trigger for me ..
sorta like i am dmmd if i do and dmmd if i dont .. used to it.
would rather stay here in peace.
it is much better than falling into a den of lions.