Each week, I go to individual therapy and group therapy. I was so worried about transference issues and having "feelings" for my T. So far, that has not happened. I am thankful that I haven't developed those kinds of feelings for my T, which seems to be so common.

Before my individual therapy appointments, I always see this one woman walk out of his office. The client he has before me. She's this little, young, blonde woman. I didn't think much of it at first.

But then, a week ago, I started to feel envious. Knowing that he has other clients who share their deepest, darkest secrets with him....and that transference exists, and that he could possibly be getting a power kick out of being in that position where women are falling over him, etc. I pushed the thought out of my mind and all was well.

The other day, that same woman walked out of his office....but this time, she approached me! She said my name and introduced herself. I was confused! She said that T told her I was in the waiting room and that he suggested that she talk to me about our group therapy - and get some feedback on how I felt about group - since she will be joining our group on Tuesday. We had a very nice chat, and I think I eased some of her concerns.

Our T came into the waiting room with a big grin on his face. The woman left, and I walked into his office. He said that he thought he'd take advantage of the "people pleasing" part of me to help talk to her about group...I said something like, "Thanks a lot for using my "people pleasing" crutch to your advantage!".....I was joking, and we laughed. Then, we got down to business....

I am now a bit uneasy about this woman joining our group. Maybe it's because she's new....or maybe it's because she's a pretty little lady who I feel will get "extra" attention because of her looks. Maybe because I feel inadequate compared to her. Maybe because of the feelings that were stirred up in me last week about the possibility of transference and him getting a power kick out of it....jealousy...all figments of my imagination.

Perhaps by Tuesday, once I get to know her, the feelings will subside. I'm just wondering what these feelings are all about, and I DON'T want them to be the start of feelings for my T.

And I don't want to talk to T about this....

Can anyone relate?