I can relate so much to this thread! My relationships with my Ts have always seemed complex, and I always wanted them to be "real," not just that my T was my T. I think, Bethers, that you explained how that can happen. Although Ts have to be professional, and we are, after all, the client, they are not a blank slate (Unless you are in traditional psychoanalysis, I guess).

I always wanted something from my Ts too, and what I wanted also was something personal from them. I wanted the T relationship to more equal. When a T let me see part of them, I was more easily to give more of me, to tell my deepest feelings.

My most recent T has told me a lot about herself, and of course, I see her as a "regular" person at times, also. It's been hard to reconcile seeing her as my T versus a "regular woman" in my community.

I will start my own thread about my situation because I think I want to contact my T also, and see her within a month. Then it will be 4 months since the last session. Bethers, it sounds like your contacting your T worked out very well. That's a place where I want to be, but I'm not there yet. I still want my T too much.

Good for you, and thanks for this thread.