Constatine I agree with what Elysium said. It sounds like you may be saying that if life doesn't get better by Sept. 12 you will check out of life. I too, hope I am wrong, but it sounds pretty basic what you are conveying.

Suicide is always a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I know because I've had to deal with that urge many times. Suicide always hurts the people we love and leaves them with questions they can never answer. Before you ever make a decision like that ask yourself if you would want your children to make that same choice. Statistics say that more people choose that path if their parents or a significan't person in their life kills himself.

No matter where you are in life right now you still matter to someone - even to a stranger like me.

NOW, if I misread your intentions, I too apologise. I would rather speak up and find myself wrong than wonder later and feel regret for my silence.

Keep talking and let people here support you. You matter.

Leslie