(((silentandscared)))

You aren't dirty. You aren't repulsive. You aren't bad. You aren't someone to be ashamed of. Your abuser's actions are.

You are innocent, clean, pure, light, free, wonderful. It wasn't your fault. You didn't do anything wrong.

My body betrayed me by responding, a simple biological response I had no control over - like vomitting, when I was a child and did not even understand what was happening. It scared me and I cried. Later, when I was older and understood what had happened I felt very, very, very dirty. Very, very, very shameful.
Today I do not feel that way. Both my abusers actions were shameful, guilty, disgusting, dirty, rotten, indecent and horrible. They are to blame for their actions, not me, or you.

Also because there is a history of incest in my family I felt my very blood was tainted, that there was something intrinsically wrong with me and everyone in my family. I know that is not true today.

I hope you are seeking and getting the help you need to rid yourself of these unnecessary, useless and hurtful feelings. You deserve that.