Hi Pom,
Ive have been sexually abused by my brother too. I confronted him and it made him abusively angry at me threatening to hit me and tauntimg me to hit him so he could really hit me . Luckily I had enough knowledge I coud see what he was doing It was very scary Yet I could not report him. He was physically violent with me growing up and it was allowed . It makes me crazey thinking about this stuff because my father sexually abused me too . And my mother was violent and verbally abusive to me..
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But most of the family does not know what happened. His wife and children treat me like I'm so selfish, uncaring, cold and indifferent person. His kids I can understand why they may think and feel that way, although it hurts me and makes me angry that I have to look like and be treated like the "bad guy" when I was not.
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it hurts me and makes me angry that I have to look like and be treated like the "bad guy" when I was not.
She was the first person I confided in about what he did. Her and I never talked about it again. Nothing ever happened. She went on to marry him. She now also treats me like I'm the cold, uncaring, indifferent person. Like I'm selfish and thoughtless. It angers and hurts me.
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I put these side by side because they are the most important . Pom. The whole family does not know . And they need too But your afraid youll get more of what you've been getting .
That your mentally ill and the problem . But see your not . Your brother and Mother are.
And the only one you told ( outside the family) does not belive you . If she did she woud have had second thoughts about having children with him. She let you down . You had some hopes she woud do something . maybe stand up for you get you some help.
She needs to traet you in the way she is to keep up her denial of who she fell in love with.
women choosing men over thier sisters . My mother did everything for the men and sacrificed me.
By her marrigae alone it so invaldating all around. I can see how alone you must feel . so unsupported .
It sounds like more than just a letter to your brother is need . But one step at a time .
Im so sorry Pom you had and have to go through this.
My brother does not know the truth of my father.My Father didn't know about my brother. My mother knew about My brother and me. She knew about the covert abuse my father did . She Knew about the physical hitting and some she did not know about . I don;t know if she knew about the sexual that was physical.
I'm still thinkig about doing the same . Writing the letter of all letters . My brother and I have not spoken or seen each other in 11 years. Hes dangerous still I can tell by the kind of cards he sends me . sarcastic an directed to hurt me kind of cards . its the only kind of abuse I can see but other cannot . So all I will ask is no further cards or anything.
My bieng on here has helped me clarify things, see things i have missed . There may be more yet to uncover.
Its sad not having a family . But one can get used to it because they weren't and were not capable of really caring about us to begin with. At least not in the areas we really needed.
Patricia