is it possible even after being married almost eleven years, that I have truly never learned to "love" my wife?

sounds stupid, but I am not opening up to her and sharing my soul

it has come up in therapy, but still feel im hiding from her

my wife says she feels alone a lot...we live together but somehow live apart

ugh....

I have lived with depression and fear and anxiety most of my life, but why I am hiding things from her?