Maybe a little therapy would be in order since this seems to be such a long standing problem and is feeling even worse to you now. In therapy not only can you talk about your feelings concerning woman and get feedback, you might even do some role playing to help in situations where you are feeling panic.

Many of us do feel discomfort when looking for and trying to start a relationship, so some of your feelings are perfectly normal. The fear of rejection is strong and we are going to be rejected, perhaps several times when looking for someone to share an intimate relationship with. You will also probably do some rejecting yourself. That's all normal. Don't let rejection paralyze you. Like I said, I would try a few sessions with a counselor, you might be surprised how helpful you find it.