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#1
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Junkie
When does it happen the point when you become a junkie and find that life becomes a pill popping game to stay awake or go to Sleep to feel nothing or to feel it all Where does it end sticking your finger down your throat so you can puke and not have your parents find you overdosed maybe being lucky to make it another day Or does it end in white linen friends and family crying "we should have known" As they bury you by your friends who shared the same fate at a young age How does it happen so fast when it starts off slow this and that taken here or there, becoming a Pharmacist making concotions manufacturing death and soon it becomes your greatest inscurity you only count what you've got left to get you to the next stocking up like the apocolypse is coming afraid the world will end if your supply runs dry eating them like candy enjoying them like a movie as you play no active part your senses dulled you are not you When do your days matter when you can not remember the last time you slept or the last time you ate when everything is surreal and you are stuck in a state of mind that only feeds on your confusion thinking of how long you should wait between your doses or if one will interact with what you just took to make it past the last one you shouldn't have taken but did because you wanted to feel what you felt in the beginning no longer getting the same euphoric effects when do the others find out when you lose so much weight you look like death when your withdrawls leave you in the bathroom for hours when you don't remember what happened the day before will it be when you crash and sleep for days severly depressed unable to function or will you be left to die in a bathtub When is enough enough? Can you stop something you can not control? How do You control something you can not stop?
__________________
"The Essence Of Greatness Is The Ability To Chose Personal Fulfillment In Circumstances Where Others Chose Madness." |
#2
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Madness !!!!!
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__________________
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#3
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YES!
__________________
"The Essence Of Greatness Is The Ability To Chose Personal Fulfillment In Circumstances Where Others Chose Madness." |
#4
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“Can you stop something
you can not control? How do You control something you can not stop?” I guess that question has stumped dopers and drunks like me for thousands of years. Yours is a good poem, and I, for what it is worth, believe every word of it. I also believe that the finest writers in the world could not answer that age old question. How do I not drown in these dark cold waters of active addiction? When one places themselves in a place like that, words are of little avail. I like to think of it like watching two people in deep water. One of them knows how to swim, and the other one does not. The swimmer is in harmony with the water, cooperates with it to stay afloat. That simple life saving act seems to be almost effortless. The swimmer glides across the water at will. Perhaps they are even happy. But what of the one who has not learned that simple trick of swimming? She is fighting for her life. She is exerting an enormous amount of energy, flailing about, and yet she is sinking. She is exerting every ounce of effort at her disposal to keep her head above water, but she still slipping under. Why is that? One of two things are going on with the drowning woman. #1 she is unaware that she can swim. With a few simple steps, she can learn to not drown, or, #2 she has been shown the trick to swimming, and she doesn’t believe it will work for her. The water is forever, but drowning in it is optional. |
#5
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...
__________________
You might say it's self-indulgent. You might say it's self-destructive. But you see it's more productive than if i were to be happy. |
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