[Tigressnred]

Hi there! I am G!......I have been an alcoholic in the past, drinking so much I pass out......but now I drink so I can talk. Having grown up in foster care you were not allowed a voice, and well even when I do use my voice I feel so small and insignificant to the real world, that and my social anxiety even behind the keyboard. When I drink a little I can talk and put it out there. I keep practicing thinking it will get better with practice....but alas it does not I just watch the world go by without saying a thing. Unless I have a few drinks I do not feel comfortable to speak.......anyone else feel this way? how do you cope?

[madisgram]

welcome to pc! you pose some good questions. many people who are anxious in a social setting use alcohol to prop them up so to speak. the problem that can/may result is alcohol abuse or dependance. i urge you to keep trying to be able to talk socially without the aid of alcohol. do you have a therapist who can offer coping skills rather than alcohol to help remedy this obstacle? i used alcohol to lift my mood. it worked for a while but then became a crutch with unpleasant circumstances-alcoholism. i'm certainly not qualifying you with an alcohol problem but there are more constructive measures to deal with your social anxiety. since you posted in this forum suggests you are concerned. i hope this article may help you-

Anxiety and Alcoholism: The Connection
A type of anxiety disorder called social anxiety disorder appears to have a particularly strong link to alcohol abuse. Nearly half of all people diagnosed with social anxiety disorder also meet the definition for so-called "alcohol use disorder." And women with social anxiety disorder appear to be more likely to have an alcohol problem than men.
Social anxiety disorder is also called social phobia. People with this problem have an unusually strong sense of anxiety while they're out in public. Although many of us have a fear of speaking to large groups, people with social anxiety disorder may even have trouble eating, having a conversation, or doing other everyday activities in public without having the sense that they're being watched or judged.

http://www.everydayhealth.com/anxiet...d-in-hand.aspx

[Tigressnred]

Wow thank you so much for your response and your help. I did have a T but I let her go for the summer beings as the kids will be home and there is no way for us to talk with them running around (she comes to my house, I am mostly a shut in) I agree with you it could become a problem. I must say here at least I do not feel like a TOTAL freak so I am really working on practicing here to reach out to others. However even here I feel very small and insignificant and inconsequential but that is not you good people's fault just my own perception I know. Nevertheless very hard to overcome. When I have a few drinks I don't care how it makes me feel I just do! So the pull is very great indeed. I am going to keep practicing it though without alcohol...thank you so much!

[madisgram]

hi again tigress. it also sounds like you have low self esteem. you are the only person in this world like you and that makes you unique in a good way. learning to love yourself just as you are will help you. make a list of things you like about yourself, including what good things others see in you. then do a list of the negatives. your lists will give you insight. while doing this keep in mind how others see u might be a more realistic pic of you since you have low self esteem.

Self-esteem: 4 steps to feel better about yourself

If you have low self-esteem, harness the power of your own thoughts and beliefs to change how you feel about yourself. Start with these four steps to a healthier self-esteem.

https://www.mayoclinic.com/health/self-esteem/MH00129
hope this article helps. it's a very good one!