[kelseyraeann]

I have had Social Anxiety my whole life! Seriously, I couldn't even act normal around my FAMILY. I was nervous, quiet, awkward... I've noticed that I learned to deal with it by using humor and being a smart *** when I talk to anyone. This problem affected my home life, my schooling, and obviously my social life. People in school never liked me, I always got picked on and never wanted to be around them. By the time I was in middle school I started to rebel, I guess.. I was hanging around the wrong crowd, started smoking weed, and then came the drinking...
I started defying my parents, going to the local parks and hanging out with the homeless people in my neighborhood, drinking every single night. I had a few altercations with cops, and I was just always in trouble. And I was always drunk... I am 19 years old now and I am still drinking somewhat heavily. I find it more difficult for myself to get a job because I am too afraid to talk to managers, go in and apply, and terrified of interviews.. I feel like a helpless loser and I really want help. I am seeking it in so many ways. I have nobody to talk to. I am seriously depressed.. I need something. Can anyone help me?

[madisgram]

welcome to pc kelsey. many of us used alcohol to hide other problems we had-like anxiety and we feel alcohol loosens us up, overcoming shyness, depression, anger, etc. the problem for me was i was self medicating the underlying things i needed to change rather than masking things using alcohol. in my case i became an alcoholic cause it was a quick fix. a fix that backfired on me.
hope this helps and glad you posted. you show insight into what's going on.

[kelseyraeann]

Originally Posted by madisgram

welcome to pc kelsey. many of us used alcohol to hide other problems we had-like anxiety and we feel alcohol loosens us up, overcoming shyness, depression, anger, etc. the problem for me was i was self medicating the underlying things i needed to change rather than masking things using alcohol. in my case i became an alcoholic cause it was a quick fix. a fix that backfired on me.
hope this helps and glad you posted. you show insight into what's going on.

Alcohol definitely helps me to loosen up.. But I don't want to drink anymore because it isn't doing good for my life.. I have an extremely addictive personality... However I have trouble finding a way to get my feelings out into words ALWAYS. I sometimes blow up when I am like black out drunk and then my feelings just flow out like a river.. but I cant ever remember the next day. It is so unhealthy and I want alternatives... I wanna be able to get my feelings out in a healthy way.

[Clinte89]

Alcohol helped me loosen up alot and helped me get into the social scene as before like you mentioned i never could because of anxiety. But I have found after stopping drinking and forcing myself to be social I can do it although I stutter alot and have a hard time i can do it. So put down the bottle and force yourself to do it cause I can tell you that bottle just put me in jail to many times for it to be worth it. Maybe ask your dr. for some anti anxiety meds or something.

[splitimage]

Social anxiety was a big part of why I started drinking heavily in university - it let me go out and socialise with people in bars. But it backfired big time on me, and I became an alcoholic and lost pretty much everything. I'm sober now and trying to get my life back together.

I'd urge you to stop drinking, because believe me it isn't making anything better, it'll just destroy your life. I get a lot of support out of AA and women for sobriety. Going to AA meetings helped me with my anxiety a bit too, because everyone was so friendly and knew what I was going through, so in time I openned up.

What helped me most re the anxiety though was a Cognitive Behavioural Therapy Group for Social phobia, that I did through my psych hospital. You might ask your Dr. if there's anything similar in your area that you could be referred to.

splitimage

[ktbelle373]

Originally Posted by kelseyraeann

I have had Social Anxiety my whole life! Seriously, I couldn't even act normal around my FAMILY. I was nervous, quiet, awkward... I've noticed that I learned to deal with it by using humor and being a smart *** when I talk to anyone. This problem affected my home life, my schooling, and obviously my social life. People in school never liked me, I always got picked on and never wanted to be around them. By the time I was in middle school I started to rebel, I guess.. I was hanging around the wrong crowd, started smoking weed, and then came the drinking...
I started defying my parents, going to the local parks and hanging out with the homeless people in my neighborhood, drinking every single night. I had a few altercations with cops, and I was just always in trouble. And I was always drunk... I am 19 years old now and I am still drinking somewhat heavily. I find it more difficult for myself to get a job because I am too afraid to talk to managers, go in and apply, and terrified of interviews.. I feel like a helpless loser and I really want help. I am seeking it in so many ways. I have nobody to talk to. I am seriously depressed.. I need something. Can anyone help me?

Wow Im a lot like you, i've always been socialy aqward, rebeled against anything that came my way, got into trouble with the law, problems at home, i ended up getting sober when i was 20, i went to meetings for a year then met my ex and put all my eggs in one basket and stoped going to aa meetings. now im starting to go to meetings again, and i feel alone there, i dont feel like im a part of aa yet. but my sponser says that once i really get into working the program life gets easier and more enjoyable, so im gonna keep going. I, like you am terrfied of having a job and i have an interview coming up, but working the aa program is helping me see that i am more capable than i give myself credit for, that i just need to let go of my fears and do the next right thing, i think if you started going to aa meetings it would change your life for the better, i know right now its so hard to see a life with out alchol. but there is a better life out there for you. i was really depressed when i was drinking too, but getting sober helped that a lot. your not a loser, your an alcholic and right now there are rooms and rooms filled with poeple like you that can help you. try to get to at least one meeting, see what you think, theres a better life out there for you, i hope you find it soon.

[truitt661]

Alcohol do help me a lot when I am going to visit or having emotional problems. I do hate the fact that I am a heavy drinker. Every morning or when I am not at work I am always drinking and I feel much better once I get that buzzed.

[Beachlvr75]

I use alcohol to forget things ,to destress,I would drink to get happy,have energy, to overcome shyness or just to even deal with people. Even drank because it made me more confident. I've been sober for 6 days. I lost my job, my license,and my car is being auctioned off by the goverment. Also spent time in jail. Not a place you want to be. I have 2 dwi's and may have to do more time and may never get my license back. Alcohol is not the answer and i'm finding that out the hard way.

[tracist514]

I def can relate Kelsey. I've always been a very shy kid. I certainly had some social anxiety which helped me pick up in my teens. As always it starts off fun and ends far past a good time. At one point I drank 6-7 days a week. At that time I was in a bad place and solely used drinking to numb all feelings. I'd say the last three years I tried to stop on my own but always picked up. I'd be dry for weeks even months at a time but this diease is sick and would win.

I'm currently sober for 147 days, thanks to AA. I'm working my program the best I can. Try to find a meeting in your area, you're never too young to attend. The 1st time I walked into AA at 23 (I'm 29 now). I walked right back out saying I was too young to be there. And I drank myself stupid for another 6 years. I know you're 19 years old but at least you are aware and williing to admit there is a problem. 19 is when I got out of control so I admire you for writing on here. AA was the best thing I opened myself too. I have such wonderful support system there. They also understand and never judge you.

I wish you the best and I'll shoot you a request on here. I you ever need someone to chat with send me a message.

[kelseyraeann]

Originally Posted by tracist514

I def can relate Kelsey. I've always been a very shy kid. I certainly had some social anxiety which helped me pick up in my teens. As always it starts off fun and ends far past a good time. At one point I drank 6-7 days a week. At that time I was in a bad place and solely used drinking to numb all feelings. I'd say the last three years I tried to stop on my own but always picked up. I'd be dry for weeks even months at a time but this diease is sick and would win.

I'm currently sober for 147 days, thanks to AA. I'm working my program the best I can. Try to find a meeting in your area, you're never too young to attend. The 1st time I walked into AA at 23 (I'm 29 now). I walked right back out saying I was too young to be there. And I drank myself stupid for another 6 years. I know you're 19 years old but at least you are aware and williing to admit there is a problem. 19 is when I got out of control so I admire you for writing on here. AA was the best thing I opened myself too. I have such wonderful support system there. They also understand and never judge you.

I wish you the best and I'll shoot you a request on here. I you ever need someone to chat with send me a message.

No AA for me yet, but I haven't had alcohol in a month all on my own. I've smoke pot though "/ and I have an appointment with a psychiatrist tomorrow, because I am still feeling really horrible and down on myself for a million different reasons, not just the SA.. Although I feel like it is controlling my life, and so is my depression. It is stopping me from being who I can be, and it is keeping me stuck in this city that holds my past and I need to get out.

You have been the most supportive person to reply to one of my threads, so for that I thank you, and congratulations on being sober! You're doing great! =]

[tracist514]

I won't push AA on you, but if you ever get to attend a meeting just be open to it. I'm grateful to AA because it's giving me the tools I need to stay sober. AWSOME, you should be proud of yourself to be sober for a month. It's very hard and a lot of work.

And Thank you, I really am grateful for your response and comment . I wish you all the best at the psychiatrist. I'm currently in therapy as well. It certainly helps me deal with my depression/anxiety (I'm not on meds though, going all natural lol). Due to my addictive personally I can't afford to take anything. It could trigger old habits and that's the last thing I want. Again best wishes and prayers your way. Just take it one day at a time.

[tracist514]

Originally Posted by kelseyraeann

No AA for me yet, but I haven't had alcohol in a month all on my own. I've smoke pot though "/ and I have an appointment with a psychiatrist tomorrow, because I am still feeling really horrible and down on myself for a million different reasons, not just the SA.. Although I feel like it is controlling my life, and so is my depression. It is stopping me from being who I can be, and it is keeping me stuck in this city that holds my past and I need to get out.

You have been the most supportive person to reply to one of my threads, so for that I thank you, and congratulations on being sober! You're doing great! =]

I won't push AA on you, but if you ever get to attend a meeting just be open to it. I'm grateful to AA because it's giving me the tools I need to stay sober. AWSOME, you should be proud of yourself to be sober for a month. It's very hard.

And Thank you, I really am grateful for your response and comment . I wish you all the best at the psychiatrist. I'm currently in therapy as well. It certainly helps me deal with my depression/anxiety (I'm not on meds though, going all natural lol). Due to my addictive personally I can't afford to take anything. It could trigger old habits and that's the last thing I want. Again best wishes and prayers your way. Just take it one day at a time.