[Leed]

Days of Healing Days of Joy..................................Oct. 4th
What reason weaves, by passion is undone.........Alexander Pope

Self-esteem is always the result of self-image. As we see ourselves, so we place value on ourselves. Self-esteem is basically the value we place upon ourselves.

Self-image is the definition we have of ourselves. It is what we see when we look in the mirror. Thus it is critical that we take care of the behaviors and situations we place ourselves in - for from these our definition of "self" is made.

Fruitlessly pursuing lost loves is self-defeating. Driving around an ex-lover's apartment at four in the morning or checking out parking lots behind bars or attempting to find true love in a singles bar is simply self-defeating behavior. While we are engaged in any such behavior, the definition of ourselves as being a loser, as always suffering, as never having anything go right, is being deepened. Of course it is. We are setting up situations where that is the only possible consequence. We need to be aware of the consequences of our actions.
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Today, I will consider the difference between obsession and love.

[madisgram]

Self-image is the definition we have of ourselves. It is what we see when we look in the mirror. Thus it is critical that we take care of the behaviors and situations we place ourselves in - for from these our definition of "self" is made.

an old timer i knew always started his sharing with this-
"how do i conduct my affairs today?"
i loved that cause it was a reminder to me. we are measured by our own conduct to others as well as ourselves.

[Leed]

How true Madisgram. Years ago, I didn't seem to care what others thought of my conduct. I partied like a fool, and acted like I was the only person around --- and didn't even consider others who were around.

When I got sober, I had SOME memory of what I had done, and I was appalled. I shudder to think what people must have thought of me, and it's taken a lot of years to change peoples' ideas of me and clean up my reputation of an out of control drunk. And of course MY own idea of myself was horrendous -- my self-esteem was in the pits and I wasn't sure I'd ever get out of it.

AA helped me crawl out of that pit. I knew I wasn't alone and there were others just like me. So slowly, I arose and came up among the living and began to feel more like a human being!