[Leed]

Days of Healing, Days of Joy....................................................Dec. 13th

"If you dam a river it stagnates. Running water is beautiful water. So be a channel."..............................................................English proverb

Pain has a loud voice. When we are in distress our attention and energies naturally turn inward. When we are wounded and bleeding we don't care about concerns as mundane as the price of gas.

It is as it should be.

Yet at some point, the intense inward look is no longer necessary and can actually be counterproductive. At that point we need to look beyond ourselves and be willing to aid in the healing of others.

An adult child's all-too-quick, shame-based response is "But I have nothing to give. I can barely keep my own nose above water." Such is not the case.

Most adult children have suffered. We can share that. We can have enormous encouragement and understanding as a gift to heal others. To the degree that we have learned to work through our own pain and to exhibit a sense of our own power, we can show others that none of us has to be a victim of the past.
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God loves and accepts me as I am - and so do I.

Keeping my "own nose above water" was exactly how I felt in my early days of sobriety. Being fearful and ashamed, I felt I had nothing to offer anyone. But my home group decided for me that I needed to share what I had suffered and what I had learned so far, with juvenile delinquents in lockups and with prisoners. They also had me speak at out of town meetings. This was as much for me as for the people I was speaking to, as my self-esteem was in the cellar. By speaking to others I gained a sense of accomplishment, while realizing I had a long way to go.