[damajdancer]

I have had past addictions with coc, speed, and pot.
I am proud to say that I got help for all
these very unhealthy drugs, and am no longer
addicted. But lately I have been having these "urges" to smoke pot again. But I have'nt had any "urges" to do
coc, or speed. I made my family and myself a promise to never do drugs again. And I will keep that promise, it's just that these "urges" wont go away, and I dont want to hurt myself over something that should have been over a long time ago.
Any suggestions?
-megan-

[ster]

I know how you feel my sober clean date is nov. 9,1990 there are still times when the urge shows its head. I have to be aware that if I go back to using I will have thrown everything I have been working for. I hope this helps

[damajdancer]

thanx, that helps a lot!!!
-megan-

Is there a reason why the urges are coming back now?

Are you feeling stressed and wanting some escape?
Are people around you using etc?

Though sometimes it can be physiological... Sometimes there are psychological reasons as well and if we can figure out the psychology then the cravings slacken off...

[damajdancer]

YES, i have been SO stressed, and very depressed.
no one around me smokes it.
i think it might be b/c im so down right now, and so fed up with everything!
thanx
-megan-

I get cravings to drink or smoke pot or take valium or something when I'm feeling anxious. It is a way of 'self medicating' I guess.

Are there other things you can do to take care of yourself instead? Have a nice long bubble bath with a good book and candles? Can SO give you a massage with some essential oil? Can you go get a massage? What sorts of things do you like to do to destress and take care of yourself? Sometimes we use drugs / alchohol as our way of destressing so when we stop using to destress then we need to figure out alternative ways of doing that. That might help the cravings slacken a little...

Do you have anyone to talk to about how you are feeling? Sometimes that can help too... You could post about it on the boards... Sometimes talking it out and getting some support can help us feel a little better too...

[damajdancer]

when im stressed i like to run, and keeping running, then take a long hot shower. the bubble bath and massage sounds great! i have a T but sometimes it's not enough. i know that sounds needy, but i cant help it, i feel like he doesnt really understand. so it's nice to talk to people who have been through the same stuff.
thanx for the advice!
-megan-

[PasDeDeux]

Hi , I didn't read the whole thread but I will PM you on part of this, the other part is I do not think it is needy for your need for more than T on this issue. I believe only someone who has been there and not by way of a book or classroom can understand and truly GET what it's like to crave something like drugs. I think groups LIKE NA and AA and the like are good because it's a bunch of people who are in the same spot , some farther ahead some behind but all in all the same spot as far as the desire and need to get away. Mostly they just GET IT

Running is a great thing for stress :-) I agree with the previous poster, it doesn't sound overly needy. Everyone is a little needy sometimes... Part of being human... Part of being a social animal and so on and so forth. I'm sorry that you feel like he doesn't really understand :-( Er... How do you mean he doesn't understand? Do you mean about the cravings, or about things that you talk to him about more generally? It might be that there is a communication problem that could be sorted...

I personally think... That one doesn't have to have a history of drug and alchohol issues to understand something of what it is like... The same way one doesn't have to have a history of schizophrenia or BPD or bipolar or depression or anxiety or OCD to understand what it is like enough to be able to help someone with those issues. I do agree, though, that it can be harder for people to understand who don't have a history, but I don't think that there is any special helping ability conferred on those with a history.

When it comes to support though, yeah I guess I hear people when they say that it helps to talk to people who have been through similar issues. I understand why someone might prefer to go to someone with a history with certain issues. Might just be that the t is a bad match though...

[damajdancer]

No no, my T is perfect, he has helped me through my toughest times. Sometimes I just feel like since he has never been through what I have, that he just doesnt understand. And thats ok with me.
Thanx for all your support everyone!
-megan-

Hey. I'm glad that you feel that your t has helped you through some pretty tough times :-)

You said that (regarding your cravings):

> i think it might be b/c im so down right now, and so fed up with everything!

You might not feel like he understands your cravings...
But could you talk to him about feeling down right now, and feeling fed up with everything?
Because it sounds like the cravings are a response to that and thus even if he doesn't understand the cravings...
He might be able to help you process what it is that is resulting in your feeling down / fed up.

Is he okay with helping you on that kind of stuff?

Um... Regarding your initial question...

I think that urges to use are strongest in the time that we first give them up. Because it is habit / routine. Like how I used to have a j when I first woke up in the morning, and first thing before sleep at night. It took a long time for me to get over craving that (mostly out of habit) at those times.

But then over time the habit breaks its hold... Then my most severe cravings were when I felt... Hungry, angry, lonely, tired. That kind of stuff. I think I learned somewhere that those kinds of feelings were more likely to result in cravings. Unfortunately (I think) those features are really unavoidable features of the human experience. We can't avoid the feelings but it can help us deal with the cravings to know that when we feel like that we are more likely to crave but that the cravings will cease if we take care of the feelings (by eating or sleeping or whatever).

Now... I get cravings (pretty intense) at times. Mostly... When I'm feeling anxious / depressed. What I've kinda learned is that when I have cravings... That means I'm having some trouble with feeling anxious depressed. Like if I crave vegemite then I know I'm having some trouble with getting my vitamin B / salt intake requirements met. What helps me deal with the cravings is to try and deal to the feeling. Mostly that means... To talk about it.

I guess I'm trying to say that in response to your initial question... I'm not sure that the cravings ever go away completely. But I am sure that they become more managable as we learn the 'message' that the cravings are 'telling us' (ie that one is feeling depressed / anxious and one really wants the feelng to cease). In a way 'cravings' are messages from your body. After a while... I do think that the cravings get less intense as you learn other ways of coping with / dealing with the feelings that prompt the cravings. Doesn't matter so much (IMO) whether your t can understand the cravings or not... So long as your t can help you figure ways to deal with the feelings.

So I guess that is why I ask... Can he?

This is just what I've figured for me in my experience and I appreciate others might have different experiences... So just take what works for you and ignore the rest :-)

[damajdancer]

Thank you special k, that really helps. I think my t could help me with that, he has helped me with worse feelings! It also helps to know that Im not alone. So thanx for sharing a bit of your story. And thanx for the advice.
-megan-