[sticksXstones]

What do you do when you know you need help, that you can't go on living the way you do, that something needs to change, yet you're reluctant to take the steps you know you need to take?

Here are the steps that I imagine one would need to take to get help
(in no particular order):
1. Tell someone
2. Admit to yourself that you can't do it alone
3. Tell someone
4. Tell someone

To me, it all comes down to telling someone about it. Which, in itself is one of the hardest things to do because it requires facing the fact that you have a problem, then having to explain the situation, sometimes having to admit to lying and deception, and finally, because telling someone means that things will really have to change.

So what do you do?

I chose to come here, where people don't know me. Because at the moment, I feel that it's the only thing I am capable of doing for myself. Until I am more ready.

[Jqi3721]

As far as I can see hun you've already done 1 and 2 on that list just by posting here. We may not know you but sometimes that anonymity makes it easier to take the first steps. Hopefully at some point you will be able to speak out to someone closer to you, but either way your not doing this alone anymore

[Dionysius]

I totally agree with Jqi3721, you HAVE taken the first steps to getting help. You could post a few times on here to gain confidence, (that`s what I did), good luck, Dionysius.

[sticksXstones]

Thank you for the replies. I'm so scared of telling my family, I guess it's partly not wanting to hurt them, not wanting to see the disappointment in their faces, and not wanting to explain everything - admitting to lies and revealing the full extent of my sneakiness. Basically, I don't want to lose the trust that I know I don't deserve in the first place.

[Jqi3721]

Well first, you do deserve their trust - your poorly, you haven't robbed a bank (as my uncle would say)

Also there is no 'deadline' for telling your family. And when you decide to there are a multitude of different ways to go about it. It's something you do when you are ready.

[therapy-testing]

I'm sure there is someone who can help you.

[Evil Schnoodle]

I agree. Telling someone is the hardest part. I have a lot of shame. I know that I am addicted to alcohol, part of me hates it and part of me likes it. The shame keeps me stuck. My wife and friends know I "have a problem", but I hide it well most of the time and they don't realize the extent. I'm afraid of both losing them, and sadly losing the alcohol if I tell my truth. It is scary.