[supernaught16]

i dated an ex addict for two years (meth). first year, she was recovering, clean for four years. stayed alone. just really working on herself. she did really good and looking back, I am really happy and proud as I never seen someone want to just work on herself and learn to be happy alone.

a red flag popped up and I left her for a few months.

a year went by and there seemed to be a lot of trouble and I couldn't put my finger on it. I never thought of it being meth relapse. how could it be? I knew her for a year and she was doing soooooo good. the trouble grew like osmosis to the point to where I gave up.

she robbed her friends house, tried robbing her other friends house, then went back the next day and hung out with these people and blamed it on innocent people and turned enemies against these people "who did it" when really, they don't do meth, she does and she's hanging out with this tweeker person egging on her tweeker pal about these poor victims that the real enemy created.

Her friend, texted me and said that she is on meth again, my exes parents were really mad last time I spoke to them, had the tone in their voice like they wanted no conversation about their daughter even if it was to help her.

She is digging this massive hole for herself really fast.

I have a feeling (I don't talk to her anymore... nooooooooooo way) that she was kicked out of her house because the person who told me she is back on the go fast said she is living on this other street in this tweeker pad now.

I know nothing about that stuff.... I was always a drinker and stoner.

so my question is...

how long do people typically stay on meth for?

with my drinking, I couldn't stop. I wanted to quit drinking for years but not to sound cliche but, it was an obsession of the mind. I could not stop.

the only reason I did stop was my mom dropped me off at a rehab in the middle of the woods 200 miles away and the family I loved was no longer there for me so after I DT'd and withdrawled I hopped the wall that surrounded the complex and ran away to be homeless for eight months until I could get my own place and fight for my life to have my family back.

I'm a different person though.... I have a heart and seeing my mother see me like that and leave me like that was something that made me want to kick the **** out of alcoholism and do something to make her happy. I don't know how long someone would tweak for until they figure it out...

Does anyone know about this?

I'm not trying to get her back or anything....

I just, can't believe she is going down like this.

I remember this time she was wearing these pants that used to be so tight on her and then I remember those pants sagging and stuff, then I saw pictures of us a year ago and she was thick, now she is skinny... Just...

With meth is it like the same thing with my alcoholism? You don't stop until youre about to die alone in the middle of the woods?

Or is it like shrooms where you can do it and stop whenever you want?

[Altered Moment]

Oh no it's nothing like shrooms. It's worse than alcoholism. I am your classic alcoholic stoner but the last five years before I got sober I was a meth head. At that time they didn't even think it was addictive. Now they say it is almost as bad as heroin. I only snorted but if you smoke it it is ten times worse.

Eventually it makes you psychotic. It's wierd though because I knew a few guys who had been doing it for many years and it didn't seem to affect them like it did me. One guy could take it or leave it. He obviously wasn't a true addict like me.

When I was in rehab at two weeks clean and sober I schitzed out. Full blown manic episode with major psychosis. Three weeks in the psyche ward and over a year of psychosis. They thought it was a bad manic episode but it was really meth withdrawal. PAWS. It took over a year to get my brain back to normal.

They didn't know much about back then. This is when it first became popular in CA. The rest of the country had never heard of it yet. Before that only bikers like the hells angels were into it.

Nasty nasty stuff. No telling how long. Hopefully it puts her in the psyche ward and she gets clean again. Most people eventually get psychotic from it. Smoking it is way worse.

I actually started doing it to quit drinking. I hardly drank that much in those five years. I would drink to try and come down but it didn't really have an effect on me. And I was super motivated at work. I loved working and didn't want to stop at the end of the day. In the end I was so schitzed out I got fired from two real good jobs. Yeah over a year clean and still on heavy duty meds and still psychotic. Crazy. Most alcoholics don't go through bad withdrawal like you did. Even though we drank pretty heavy it wasn't 750ml a day every day.

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[deicher82]

Only 12% of meth addicts recover according to SAMHSA.

[angelene]

Like zinco said, definitely not something you can just stop whenever you want. On the bright side, I've known people who are in that 12%. Meth-free for years and staying away from bad influences.
You've got to really want to stop; it is freakin' ridiculously powerful stuff.

[supernaught16]

thank you everybody. I know it's not my responsibility and I know I am not super man. but, when I got back with her after our split up, she was drinking a fifth of tequila a day which wa really off putting too because, she never drank before and would tell me she was going to leave me if I continued drinking. So when we got back together not only wa she full blown drinking apparently relapsed on meth.

when I questioned her about her drinking she said, "it hurt a lot when we broke up, it was really hurtful." That stuck with me but still, it's not my fault she decided to drink and relapse on meth and for all I know, this could be a "guilt manipulation" that I read about.

is there an association between meth and drinking? does smoking meth create a craving or carelessness to drink or something? I don't smoke ciggs or tobacco at all, I'm anti actually, I always was about the herb but when I drank I smoked plenty of cigars and and smoked ciggs. I never would have done that if I didn't drink though.

Is there an association like that with meth? I ask because it is odd that a non drinker just threw it all out the window and became a habitual daily drinker. Then finding out she relapsed on meth later.

Now... The people sticking their heads around the corner and watching her sleep only to hide around the corner again when she tried to look at them is all making sense lol... She went to the hotel management and asked for another room because she said the room was haunted lol... i read about these shadow people... where would she do this stuff without me noticing? I feel like an idiot for not catching on. She was just so innocent in my eyes.... once upon a time.

[supernaught16]

i just read the part where zinco said he/she snorted it. My ex was heavy into snorting coke so she was probably snorting the meth. I wouldn't find any pipes or lighter burns and stuff like that people are talking about. Probably snorted it too out of habit/ ritual because of her five year coke binge. said would never do coke again, enter meth.

the same time the shadow people hiding at the hotel that I mentioned above, she went so ballistic and crazy accusing me of stealing a dollar bill from her. however, I don't think you need any form of tube to do a line... I found crazy ways to smoke weed and hide my drinking, seems like putting a line up a nose without a tube is a walk in the park compared to the stuff I was doing to hide my drinking.

I remember hiding my smoking and drinking was part of the fun too. it was part of it and i would get new vaperoizers and new contraptions just to "get over on people" and see if i could hide my high and use around using right in front of people... including drinking while ushering people at both of my brothers weddings.

is the same fun in hiding it involved with meth?

[supernaught16]

i would get my day started with that half fifth bottle and then feel like I needed a 750 ml bottle. 325 ml. of rum was my coffee. 750 ml was like my gatorade and water (stranger is I'm an athlete.... Once I drank a bottle got on the treadmill and ran a mile just under 6 minutes. my mentality was, if Im killing myself might as well go through 6 minutes of pain to get back in shape real quick).

[deicher82]

For me a large part of the thrill of my drug habit was hiding it. As far as the drinking goes I would imagine that since she had been clean, alcohol was "not as bad" as other things because it was legal and also didn't have the societal stigma as illegal drugs. She may have been drinking to come down from meth if she was using at the time. I hope you are feeling a little better about yourself and not blaming yourself. An addict or alcoholic is going to do what an addict or alcoholic wants to do. Period. Keep your head up supernaught16.

[supernaught16]

Originally Posted by deicher82

For me a large part of the thrill of my drug habit was hiding it. As far as the drinking goes I would imagine that since she had been clean, alcohol was "not as bad" as other things because it was legal and also didn't have the societal stigma as illegal drugs. She may have been drinking to come down from meth if she was using at the time. I hope you are feeling a little better about yourself and not blaming yourself. An addict or alcoholic is going to do what an addict or alcoholic wants to do. Period. Keep your head up supernaught16.

straight up. keep your head up too.

[Altered Moment]

Psychosis and paranoia from the meth it sounds like. You can put it in your coffee or whatever and get as wired as snorting. Did that at work a lot. I drank to come down and you can drink bucket loads before it mellows you out.

There's a connection to all of it. An addict is an addict. You just stuck to your drug of choice. If you had no booze and couldn't get any and someone chalked out a line I'll bet you would do it. Then you get used to it and like it. I hated it at first. To intense.

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[hellboy]

Forever.

[Mygrandjourney]

Originally Posted by hellboy

Forever.

Or until the costs outweigh the benefits and they're ready to stop. It takes up to one year or more of outright abstinence (from all substances) for the neural pathways in the brain to form new connections and the cravings to subside (they may never completely disappear). There may be residual depression after the initial detox and that should be treated as well.
Check out the video on relapse from the HBO Addiction Series, available on youtube for some good visual representations of how the brain is activated by a trigger/craving.
Best of luck and don't forget to take care of yourself while all this is going on. Think of the oxygen mask in the airplane analogy.

[Altered Moment]

Originally Posted by Mygrandjourney

Or until the costs outweigh the benefits and they're ready to stop. It takes up to one year or more of outright abstinence (from all substances) for the neural pathways in the brain to form new connections and the cravings to subside (they may never completely disappear). There may be residual depression after the initial detox and that should be treated as well.
Check out the video on relapse from the HBO Addiction Series, available on youtube for some good visual representations of how the brain is activated by a trigger/craving.
Best of luck and don't forget to take care of yourself while all this is going on. Think of the oxygen mask in the airplane analogy.

There is a saying I learned in AA. "When the pain of staying the same exceeds the pain of changing, then we change."

I have been clean and sober for 20 years and the last five years of use was heavy meth use. It did take over a years for my brain to get back to normal. Meth induced post acute withdrawal syndrome. Exactly mimicked a full blown manic episode with lots of psychosis.

It doesn't have to be forever.